Residents of California can divorce someone in the military even if that party doesn't agree – but there are a few things to be aware of that are unique to military divorces.
If one or both spouses are in the military, the petitioner can file divorce papers either where the servicemember is stationed or in the state (usually the county courthouse) where they currently reside. If you want to file for divorce in California, then one of you must either reside or have a station in the state. It's usually better for the non-military spouse to file where they reside, as servicemembers move around often.
Some military divorces move smoothly, just like a standard divorce. But others come with extra delays and red tape. Complicated cases might require legal help from experts in military family law.
The no-fault state of California allows couples to cite one of two reasons when filing for a divorce. You're required to determine which is right for you when you create the divorce papers.
The two reasons are as follows:
You aren't required to prove that either state is true. You just must state the reason on the forms.
If you want to file for divorce in California, then one of you must either reside in or have a station in the state. California law only requires one spouse to meet residency requirements. In general, it's best for the person filing the documents to meet these rules.
It's tempting to use the serviceperson's residence to prove eligibility, but it can be difficult. Military families move about once every three years, but some move much more frequently. Some military members don't (or can't) tell their spouses where they are. If you use their California status to file, it could change or be incorrect and thus rejected by the court.
If you meet these eligibility requirements, you can file in the California county where you live regardless of where your spouse might be at the moment.
.png)
Military divorce involves the same steps used in a traditional one. You'll complete them sequentially.
Three forms kick off the military divorce process in California. You can fill them out alone or with help from divorce services like Hello Divorce, a lawyer, or another trusted divorce advisor.
The three forms are:
You're required to share financial data (mandatory financial disclosures) with your partner within 60 days of filing for divorce. You must provide those documents legally, which means serving them.
As we'll discuss more below, it's difficult to serve some military members with documents. You could opt to send these financial pieces at the same time as your starting documents.
The financial documents include the following:
Serving papers means providing documents to the partner via a legally-approved method. Several steps are involved, and they’re sometimes complicated when your spouse is serving in the military. Here’s what you need to do:
To serve someone with papers, you must know where they are. It's often difficult to find military members due to the protections enacted after 9/11. Some military branches won't tell anyone where servicemembers are, even when asked to do so.
Start with the last known address or deployment area and work forward. You might ask a lawyer to help with this step.
We’ve already outlined what documents you need to file for a military divorce. Once you’ve completed and filed them, you’ll get official copies to share with your partner.
This requires asking an adult who is not part of your case to give your spouse the documents. Learn more about methods of service in California here.
Some lawyers work with contractors to serve military members. They know how to work within the system, find out where your partner is, and how to serve them. If you have no idea where to serve this person, hiring an expert could save you time and stress.
Your server should deliver paperwork to your spouse, and that method can look really different depending on where your spouse is. For example, if your spouse is serving in California, things will look very different than the steps you’d use for a spouse who is serving in Italy.
Stay in close contact with your server and ensure that the documents have been handed off.
A server signs an official document that you must file with your paperwork. If you don't get a server's signature, your divorce can't move forward.
When the service is complete, and the form has been signed, take it back to your courthouse and file it.
After you serve papers, you must wait for a response from your spouse, and in a typical divorce, it's due in 30 days. A military timeframe could be very different.
If your partner asks for a deadline extension, you’ll be notified of that. Your paperwork can’t just hang out there with no response at all.
When your partner responds to your paperwork, you start negotiating all the terms required to end your marriage. Together or apart, you have several issues to settle, such as these:
Couples with children must decide where the kids will live, when they will visit the other parent, and who can make decisions regarding their children.
These two forms start the conversation with your spouse:
Couples with children need to determine how they'll be financially assisted. Child support payments make that possible, and couples can determine how much one party pays the other and on what schedule, or how they will share all these expenses.
All couples, even those without children, might determine one partner deserves payments to support a lifestyle that's become expected. These spousal support payments should be arranged during the divorce.
Some couples use a military member's salary as part of spousal support payments. Others look into military pensions. Californians can divide military pensions if both parties are state residents.
The debts spouses rack up during their marriage could be split equally or via another method. Assets like property and physical items like computers should also be divided between the two.
It can be difficult to determine how to split up debts and assets. The more you collaborate with your partner on these items, the better. You will get more of what you both want by working together than leaving it up to the court’s discretion.
Any divorce can be drawn out and hard to resolve. However, military divorces can be even more complex. The following two pieces of legislation play an important role in most military divorces:
The Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA) offers legal protections to individuals serving in the Army, Marine Corps, Navy, Air Force, and Coast Guard. It also applies to reservists when they’re serving on active duty.
In a traditional divorce, one person could ask for a default judgment. If you’re sent paperwork and don’t respond to it, the other party could move the case forward without your input. Per the SCRA, this isn’t possible for people serving.
Per the SCRA, the court can’t enter a default judgment until it appoints an attorney to represent you. The court can also delay proceedings for at least 90 days while you’re on duty.
The Uniformed Services Former Spouses’ Protection Act (USFSPA) stemmed from a court case in the 1980s. Divorcing people wanted clarity on whether (or not) retirement benefits accrued during marriage should be subject to division on divorce. The courts ruled that those benefits should be part of the family’s estate and subject to splitting.
Per the USFSPA, state courts can treat military retirement funds as they would any other marital property. The appropriate government agency can make those payments directly under certain conditions.
These rights aren’t automatic. The payments must be court-ordered, and they can’t be applied unless the parties meet a specific requirement.
Under USFSPA, the retirement benefits can only be shared when the spouses were married for at least 10 years, during which time the member performed at least 10 years of creditable service. If the marriage is too short or the service time is too short, the retirement benefits are protected and not divided in divorce.
People serving in the military are protected against lawsuits and other legal issues while they're serving their countries. These protections could delay your divorce. Military members on active duty can delay their proceedings throughout their active time, and they can delay it for up to 60 days after it ends.
Finding the person to serve papers can also take time. If you struggle to locate the person, this adds time to your overall timeline, too.
You can try to shorten the timeline by doing the following:
Filing paperwork costs between $435 and $450. If you must hire someone to help you serve papers or negotiate with your partner, you will pay more. If you cannot afford the fees, you can apply for a waiver.
Longer court cases involving complicated scenarios and arguing partners take longer and are more expensive. Simplifying the process could help you to save money on the case.
Divorces are legal agreements that come with plenty of consequences. Rushing the process to save money now could lead to regrets later.
All divorces involve ending a marriage. But civilian and military divorces do come with a few critical differences.
The two differences involve the following:
